An elephant walks in some mud and makes huge footprints, then it rains. What member of the Royal Family does that remind you of?
Prints Phil-up.

Can an elephant jump higher than a lamp-post?
Yes: lamp-posts can't jump.

Why do elephants wear sandals?
To stop their feet sinking in the sand.

Why do ostriches bury their heads in the sand?
To see the elephants who aren't wearing sandals.

Did you hear the one about the elephant who was always drunk?
He kept seeing pink people... -

Hannibal must have been the world's first genetic engineer;
he crossed the Alps with elephants.

'I want to put an advert in your newspaper.'
Is it to go into the Small Ads?'
'Heavens, no: I want to sell an elephant.'

'I went riding this morning.'
'Elephant back?'
'Oh yes, he got back before me.'

If you saw 9 elephants walking down the street with red socks and one elephant walking down the street with green socks, what would this prove?
That 9 out of 10 elephants wear red socks.

Is it difficult to bury an elephant?
Yes, it's a huge undertaking.